Happiness Awaits: The Mystery Behind the Masks We Wear
This year I am feeling the desire to get into the spirit and pull together a costume for Halloween.
I’m thinking something steampunk inspired, along the lines of the scene from Gilmore girls A Year in the Life where Rory and Logan go gallivanting through Stars Hollow and up the eastern seaboard.
It’s channeling a bit of the vibe of the impossible dream I’m gaining traction on and feels like a fun way to tap into that energy while we go trick-or-treating with the cousins. Who says only the kids get to have fun running through the neighborhood?!
While they like the candy enough, what they really love is getting to zip around like goofy hooligans in their costumes, stepping into the world as whatever their heart imagines. Enjoying the fun reactions as their inner vision becomes a reality for a few hours.
But wearing a mask for fun is different than wearing one to hide behind.
Our Everyday Costumes
Everyday we wake up and put on our own costumes to support our chosen identity.
Just like on Halloween, sometimes we put on masks. But in daily life we do it less for fun and connecting with the sense of possibility and more as something to hide behind.
to help us face the day
hiding our true selves from the world
to help us fit in (or at least not get called out for not fitting in)
The clothes we wear, the things we say we like, beliefs we hold, patterns we fall into.
A way of being to help us feel safe rather than one that makes us feel alive and truly happy.
So while dressing up for Halloween is fun for the night, hiding who you truly are is not the way to live a life you love.
It may bring a sense of safety, security and belonging even if it makes us uncomfortable on the inside. Because the safety of what is known and uncomfortable is better than risking that sense of stability in pursuit of something that truly reflects what their inner knowing knows to be true.
But it eats at us. Leaves us with the feeling that we’re not enough. So we keep filling in the gaps with to maintain the mask.
Paraphrasing a quote from reporter Dorothy Thompson in 1941, 'those who haven't anything in them to tell them what they like and what they don't- whether it breeding, or happiness, or wisdom or a personal code of living' are the ones who fall for false truths.
Having a strong sense of who you are and what you stand for is what fuels a true sense of security and happiness. It helps you have a strong sense of all that you bring to the table and celebrate that within yourself. It’s what compels you to not settle for ‘fine’ or false security.
It's what powers a sense of belief and possibility by exploring new ideas.
In fact, it's what makes you glow.
That undeniable, walk into the room type of energy that makes people notice and think “I want what she’s having” vibe.
Build the confidence to explore living a live you love with the free Firefly Scout Glow Map mini-course. Discover the 9 facets of your glow and create your own map to help you start growing your glow.
Journey to Happiness
My journey of discovering what it meant to live a life I love consciously started toward the end of 2017. By all accounts, life was great. House, husband, career, 2 kids (the dog came later). But though I didn’t have a name for it then, my ‘glow’ was thirsting for more of what fueled that spark within me.
Following nudges from within, I dove into exploring more about myself, understanding the ways that I work best, noticing and validating my unique traits and creating a new sense of security in navigating life.
Listen to the story on the 40 Drinks Podcast- Turning 40 and Rewriting my Story
✨ It was going through the intentional journey of naming what I like and don't like that helped me navigate an impossible moment in my life/work 'balance'.
✨ It was doing 'the work' of untangling my thoughts through journaling that revealed the true desires of my heart and led me to leaving my 9-5 to pursue my dream.
✨ It was following my curiosity and discovering a system that brought a depth of technicolor to truly understanding the mysteries of what lights me up.
And using all of that to create a new juicy reality where I show up as more of my true self. No mask required.
Explore Beneath the Mask
Stream of Consciousness journaling opened up the connection to what my heart was truly trying to tell me and gave me space to filter through the ideas my mind was telling me.
Whether you put pen to paper or take yourself on a walk and talk out these responses to yourself, be open to listening what comes up. Encourage yourself that it’s safe to be honest with your thoughts.
And most importantly, believe yourself when you touch on something that rings with a sense of truth in your heart.
Ask yourself-
Get curious about what your heart has to say when you ask this question.
What 'masks' do I find myself wearing to somehow protect myself?
If I were to wear my most favorite outfit, what am I worried people will say or think about it?
Are there situations where I notice I am not expressing my true self in order to fit in?
If I were being truly honest with myself, what fears hold me back from living a life I love?
Did this bring up some uncomfortable feelings? Ugh, I know. It doesn't feel good. But hang in there, this is where things start to get juicy.
“Anytime you’re gonna grow, you’re gonna lose something. You’re losing what you’re hanging onto to keep safe. You’re losing habits that you’re comfortable with, you’re losing familiarity.” -James Hillman, psychologist
During this season of change, how can you start to explore more about your true self and start living a life you love?
How can you explore more of the depths of who you truly are and connect with a true Sense of Enoughness and Security rooted in the truth of who you are and the confidence to share it with the world? (The Glow Map dives into how this fits in with your overall glow profile.)
Use this nugget to notice things this week and maybe inspire figuring out exactly how you show up best, no mask required.
You never know where it will take you...
If any of this gave you the gut-check nudge to take a step of action, start with creating your free Glow Map or check out my other resources for discovering what lights you up.
Founder of Firefly Scout, Stephanie Rose is a transformation-focused mentor and strategic change guide, helping people uncover the mysteries that hold them back from living a life they love. Through energy management, intuitive insights, and practical tools like the Glow Map and Human Design, with a playful, detective-inspired approach, she empowers others to confidently pursue their dreams and create sustainable, lasting change.
Start your journey and create your free Glow Map and check out her free resources to start living a life you love.
Related reading
Do you feel like your life is on hold? Ignoring the discomfort of not living a life you love to preserve a mask of security? Discover the true power of understanding what lights you up and using the power of that inherent knowledge to live a life you love.