Lately I have been noticing the push/pull of things in my life.

Particularly around how my time gets filled each day.

Noticing which things get pushed into my schedule and which ones I'm pulling in.

And how that makes me feel.

Why Time Autonomy is Important

When we sense that we have time autonomy and agency, it speaks to our sense of Freedom and Beingness.

Time autonomy is one of the facets that we explore in the Glow Map.

With a strong sense of time freedom, we experience inner peace and live fully in the present moment. This contributes to the sense of ease and flow, making it possible to align our innate desires with the realities of life.

It is an expression of our freedom and the power to choose. But our lives are increasingly built on push-based time management.

You’re likely within minutes of having a push-based moment in your day.

Our phones can be an overwhelming source of capacity draining notifications. The average person has 146 notifications daily on their phone. That’s nearly one every 10 minutes, hardly giving you a chance to dip into a flow state of thinking or productivity.

Each little ding and pop-up takes our focus out of the moment and adds more to our plate. Even a ‘hello’ from a friend can start to feel draining when all of the ‘pushes’ into our lives overwhelmingly tip the scales.

Some of them are certainly welcome and can provide inspiring or necessary information in the moment, like an affirmation from the I Am app, which I love, or a ping to say “your order is ready”. But most of these ‘pushes’ for your time and attention drain that ‘glow’ we embody.

They bring on feelings of frustration and anxiety due to the lack control over the flow of our energy and attention and demand on our capacity.

And when we feel like too many things are being pushed on us, into our lives, that impacts how we feel and dims our glow.

• That meeting popped onto your calendar that makes you groan

• The "can you pick this up on your way home" ask

• The "do you have a minute?" that is far more than a minute

• The "I'm going to need you to do this by tomorrow" request

This can be a dynamic you feel at home too-

• "I need my favorite shirt washed"

• "The dog puked on the rug"

• "We need more dish detergent"

• "The toilet is clogged again"

It's easy to slip into a pattern where everything is a push to force itself into your day.

It fills it up in a way that drains us. This drain on capacity then causes us to not make the intentional choice to pull things into our day.

The Power of Pulling and Sense of Freedom

When we feel time autonomy and the power (and capacity) to pull things into our schedule it increases our sense of Freedom and Beingness. We shift the dynamic from the pressure to respond into the empowerment of choice. That shift makes us feel differently about how and where we are focusing our time.

Embodying a strong sense of Freedom and Beingness shows up in our Glow Map and looks like-

• Making decisions based on your own values and intuition, not external pressures

• Feeling a sense of liberation in pursuing your passions, regardless of external validation

• Experiencing a sense of flow and effortless action in your daily activities

• Enjoying a sense of playfulness and spontaneity in your approach to life

Even when we are focusing our time on things that are maybe not top of our list that we enjoy, they become inherently more fulfilling when we draw them in versus having to accommodate someone else pushing them.

• That meeting that always seems to zap you energy feels a little bit more tolerable when you have the time autonomy to pick the time that works better for you.

• The reaching out before you wrap up your day to see if there is anything that you can stop and pick up and feeling like you’re setting up your evening on a good note.

• The confidence to say that you have a full plate right now, but you could plan on 30 minutes tomorrow to talk it through.

This could also be lumped in with setting boundaries, but understanding the nuances of this push/pull on your time helps you make more emotionally intelligent decisions while honoring what your glow, your mental, physical, emotional and spiritual capacity levels are telling you.

Establishing Time Boundaries vs Intentional Replenishment

Pulling things into our day is more than reframing the story around what needs done and establishing boundaries around our time.

Intentionally and purposefully bringing in the things that make our lives feel expansive, that grow our glow. Pulling things into our day brings about a feeling of lightness, excitement and inspiration.

• Scheduling the haircut that makes you feel good about yourself

• Setting aside time to write or create in a way that frees your mind

• Protecting idle time for the opportunity to day dream or simply be in the moment

• Stepping out for a walk without someone calling or interrupting

And there are ripple effects that we feel that compound the benefits. When our sense of Freedom and Beingness is being fulfilled, we start to feel more secure in how we allocate our capacity. This connects with the Sense of Enoughness and Security on the Glow Map.

Another ripple effect is that when we have the time freedom to pull in activities that our heart, it contributes to our glow through our Sense of Fulfillment, Purpose and Regeneration. Our capacity feels restored in this act of self-care of doing something that sensed that we needed.

Shift the Dynamic and Initiate Change

When the push/pull pressure on how we allocate our time is out of congruence with the rhythms of our heart, life starts to feel heavy.

Everyday requests feel like more of a drain.

Life feels more like going through the motions to get through the day. And less like it is filled with experiences that light you up.

Use the next few days to notice the push/pull of how your time gets filled. Do a “Freedom Audit” with your calendar. Analyze your daily routine, hobbies, and relationships. Make a note of what shows up on your calendar and whether it was added through push or pull energy. Based on that list, notice what areas restrict your sense of freedom? What items bring up an underlying sense of frustration, bitterness, anger or disappointment? What items bring in a layer of satisfaction, success, peace or surprise? What changes can you make to feel like you are showing up more authentically as yourself based on how you schedule your day?

Tune into how things feel when they are pushed into your schedule versus when you pull them in.

And notice what changes when you change the push/pull dynamic.

To explore more ways to explore your glow, download the ​free Glow Map mini-course​ and workbook.

Journaling Prompts to Inspire Change

Spending time to write out your thoughts is a powerful practice to ease the mental swirl and allow the clues that lead to clarity to come through.

Ask yourself-

• How would I describe the push/pull dynamic of my daily schedule?

• How does it make me feel when something gets pushed into my schedule?

• When is a time I pulled something into my schedule and how did it make me feel?

• What is something I can pull into my schedule this week?

What did this spark for you in how you feel about your daily schedule and how your time is allocated?

Use this nugget to notice things this week and maybe inspire some change in how you navigate your daily schedule and long-term plans.

You never know where it will take you...

Stephanie Rose is a transformation-focused mentor and strategic change guide, helping people uncover the mysteries that hold them back from living a life they love. Through energy management, intuitive insights, and practical tools like the Glow Map and Human Design, with a playful, detective-inspired approach, she empowers others to confidently pursue their dreams and create sustainable, lasting change.  

Start your journey and sign up for her newsletter and check out her free resources.

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